Sunday, October 19, 2008

Pesky Gnomes


I understand that there is a new European pest invading American gardens that, until now, had no native predators. Garden Gnomes first popped up in city gardens. As I understand it, they were first seen in small plots near churches, where they were first introduced by unsuspecting gardeners, perhaps to ward off the gargoyles. They have established their own town and are spreading, like cudzu, to the 'burbs. We must stop this onslaught now! Using these gnome-bearers they can be carried off in an aggressive fashion, the only effective solution for permanent removal! If your garden gnome situation is not yet large enough to warrant the large garden gnome-bearers, mini-gnome-bearers may also be employed. If you have no sitings, yet, of these pests, a single scary gnome-be-gone should do the trick.

And, for those of you experiencing the explosion of flamingos migrating out of Florida, finding a home in your yard, there is the flamingo-be-gone.

Happy Gardening!

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